yesterday I blundered. I was so mad. livid really, until I realized that I was partly to blame for the problem. oops. I ate M&M's and drank rootbeer to combat the blunder. So I was inspired to share some of my not so impressive moments. hopefully it will help yesterdays blunder be funny faster. I hope they can entertain you as well.
- when I was 9, I raced a boy back from recess. I beat him. we were the first to arrive to the classroom door. I was so excited about my victory, I totally missed his boyish declaration of love. When he finished, I turned and said, "what?" he blushed and never spoke to me again. oops. I think this one has happened several times in my life, just in various levels of humiliation and in different ways and settings.
- when I was 10, the teacher asked everyone to come sit on the floor for sharing time or something. we all walked over. I daydreamed as I walked. a few seconds later, the silent staring eyes pointed out that I was standing in the middle of a circle of well behaved children and I was the only one standing. I turned red, sat down, and would have cried had my pride not interfered.
- My big brother came to hear me play the harp in college. I wanted my big brother to be proud of me. It was an ensemble practice. Right when he arrived, my teacher told me how bad I did. I was so hurt and angry with that mean woman. She really is a nice lady, but she hurt my family pride.
- I arrived late to my house for my first date with Rich. He was sitting on my front porch waiting, and doing so with a lot of patience. Good thing he forgives or my now life would surely be a lot different now.
- I tried to compliment an Italian woman once on her great cooking. I said it had no preservatives in it and that's why it tasted so good. For those of you who know the translation for preservatives will know this blunder. I'm too embarrassed to type it. Suffice it to say, there was stunned silence at the table. If you ever want to compliment an Italian's cooking, just say, "it's good. great, even."
- I once spilled homemade raspberry juice all over the floor of an airplane - like 1 liter full, while walking out of the plane, so there was a line of people behind me who saw me and then had to walk over the mess. This was back when you could fly with your own liquids. oops.
- Last week, a lady called and asked me to play the harp on Saturday May 7th. For those of you wondering, Saturday is the 8th. I showed up to an empty building with my 6 foot tall, 90 pound harp in tow. I was livid. But I guess I didn't check the date and she gave me the wrong day of the week. oops.
4 comments:
I want to know the translation error. Did you say there wasn't any poop in her food? Penises? Black people? I have to know.
I think eating M&Ms and drinking root beer was the totally logical and absolutely best thing to do. You should just congratulate yourself on handling a sticky situation just right. That's just what I would have recommended!
PS In 1st grade our teacher passed out a stack of papers to our group of four desks, and I thought they were all mine so I kept them in a stack in front of me. The other kids threw a fit and we got in a big fight. All these papers clearly had "Nancy" on the top, so I was sure they were all mine. Turned out, they didn't say "Nancy", they said "Name" at the top. The teacher had to come over and break up the fight. I still get red in the face when I think about that.
NOOOOOOOOOOOO! You are kidding me. Seriously, I would have been livid as well. And by the way, those are really funny stories. I loved them all.
Good time in Italy.
I couldn't believe it when I heard what happened! Oh, Erica...you're the greatest!:) And I'm glad you have "oops" moments too.
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