Aaron is gone. I am so happy with my children. I am so sad. I am so lucky. I have been robbed. My 3 year old is obstinate with me. I have my best friend to love me and laugh with me. I miss him more than I ever have, knowing that I won't enjoy his company again in this life. My 4 month old is learning to laugh. I have my man taking care of us by doing the things I keep forgetting. I have fresh, unearthed memories. I am overwhelmed by up and coming events. I have a sad heart and my nights are full of sleep, but no rest. I have long stretches of being alone. I dance with my girls to upbeat pop music. I get lost in the condolences and explanations. It is heavy. It is wonderful. It is grievous. I feel sad for moving on.
I am exhausted.
to something less surreal - I have been writing down recipes for about 2 years. I had 50 written on tastebook.com and I just sent for my book - my recipes in my recipe book. I'm pretty excited.
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